Wrapped in Him
by Sbstevenson2
Summary: Regina finally brings herself to clean out their closet after Robin dies. #OutlawQueen


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Snow finds her.

She'd been cleaning out their closet. Finally felt strong enough to go through his clothes after weeks of letting them stay there, hang there, looming over her each morning when she would open the closet to pick out her clothes for the day, as if they were waiting for her to break.

Robin was gone. Taken from her all too soon. Just like everyone she loves.

She'd agreed to marry him just one week before their run-in with the God of the Underworld himself. Now the ring he'd procured for her sits on her finger, burning a hole into her skin and her heart with each passing moment.

Regina was looking at the pile of jeans and soft tee shirts he loved the wear, laying there inside a garbage bag, ready to be donated, when she snapped, all her bottled up emotions being taken out on his poor attire.

She ripped shirts from their hangers, screaming out at the unfairness of it all, of him being murdered, of all the shit that happened in her life to lead her to this moment. His death was her fault, she was sure of it.

Angry tears streamed down her face as she tossed his shirts out of the closet and across the room. She looked up, spotting his nice, button down shirt she'd convinced him to buy for one of their fancier date nights.

She stood and took his lone, white dress shirt gently off the hanger. Regina reached one hand up, wiping forcefully at her wet cheeks as another sob escaped her mouth. She slipped the shirt on, pulling it around her small frame. She looped her fingers through the holes on the sleeves as her tears dropped onto the hunter green _RL_ she'd had embroidered on the cuff, those initials now tormenting her in her grief.

She hadn't cried since that day, the day he was taken from her, not like this. She'd been pretending to be strong for Henry, and herself, convinced that if she didn't cry, and acted like everything was okay, she could move on. She didn't want to seem weak in front of her son, or anyone.

Grief is a funny thing though, it sneaks up on you when you least expect it.

Her heart cracked, fully breaking now that she's allowing her emotions to consume her. Alone in her room, she can finally admit that he's gone and never coming back, but the reality feels like it's crushing her soul.

Regina brought that embroidered sleeve up to her face, wiping again at her tear stained cheeks. She wasn't sure why she was attempting to dry them off when fresh ones continued to fall.

Sniffling, she tugged his shirt tighter around her body, imagining it's his strong arms wrapping themselves around her body. She looked over her shoulder, spotting the accumulation of shirts she'd tossed on the floor. As the memories of her soulmate, her better half, flooded her senses, she dragged herself to the messy heap.

As she sank to her knees, another agonized sob left her throat, tears flowing more vigorously as the pine scent she'd refused to wash out of them overwhelms her, as if she was completely wrapped in him. His pillow still smells like him, and she cuddles to it each night, but these shirts hit her senses differently, and her chest physically ached.

She couldn't control the tears, but she supposed it was a good thing. Letting it all out while she's home alone was bound to help her remain numb to the rest of the world.

_Regina, you are my future. _

His words echoed in her mind as she settled into the assortment of gray, green and beige shirts. Her head pillowed into a few as she brought one up to her chest like a child would a blankie, letting it soothe her shaking body.

She blinked rapidly, clearing the newest tears from her lashes as she smiled down at his initials once more on the sleeve.

A wet chuckle fell from her lips as she pictured his face, those dimples shining on his cheeks as he bit his lip in excitement over the new apparel. He'd laughed at first, saying he didn't need such fine things, but when she explained he could also wear it under his suit jacket at their wedding one day, his whole face changed and he claimed it was his most favorite piece of clothing he'd ever owned. He'd kissed her after that, his lips capturing hers so deeply like they always did.

She brought a hand up, finger tip lightly grazing over her lips as the memory of his faded from her mind, sending her another one to be tortured with. She'll never forget him, or all the small things that made him _him_, but in this moment she wished, just for five minutes, she could forget. Not him, never him, but forget the details, forget the little things that made her heart flutter, forget his words that warmed her heart and soul, forget the feel of his skin against hers, because maybe then she'd be able to sleep through the night once more, or make it a whole day without feeling sad, alone, and heartbroken.

The sobs finally ceased, but the tears didn't, as she lay there in his shirts, wishing his body heat was still in them. She took slow, calming breaths, inhaling the forest aroma that encompassed her.

And that's where Snow finds her, a grieving widow that she has been telling her was okay to let other people see, always encouraging Regina to open up, at least to her and David, and let them share in her pain.

The younger woman says her name tentatively as she steps into the room, a sad sigh escaping her lips that would normally make Regina roll her eyes, but she doesn't have the strength left in her this morning.

Snow sinks down beside her, a hand reaching out to stroke her cheek, pushing her hair behind her ear.

It's a sweet gesture, one Robin would've done had he been here (he'd done it every other time she'd allowed herself to cry in front of him). That thought brings an onslaught of new tears to her eyes, slipping down her cheeks as Snow shushes the sobs away.

She rubs her back, whispering that everything will be alright.

"He's gone," Regina croaks after a while, finally opening her eyes and looking at her former step-daughter who is blurred from the tears still looming in her brown eyes.

She gives Regina a sympathetic look, nodding her head, as she sighs again. "I know," she relents sadly, wiping a tear from her own eye.

And that sign of emotion, of someone else missing her soulmate, changes everything for her. Sitting up, Regina reaches out, taking Snow's hand in hers.

Snow looks at the dress shirt still wrapped around Regina's body and smiles, making a comment about how excited Robin had been to wear it.

It makes her smile, truly smile, for the first time in weeks. Sharing memories of him with someone other than herself might not be so bad after all.

They spend the next hour giggling softly, tears still falling every few memories, as they recount the many times the thief did something amusing.

Before Snow leaves that afternoon, she kisses Regina on the cheek, giving her a warm hug and saying she loves her.

Regina relays the love back to her and watches as her friend leaves her to finish cleaning out her fiancé's clothes alone like she'd asked. As she closes the door, Regina realizes that she does still have love in her life. It may not be the intimate, romantic type of love that she craves, but she knows she has the love of her son and her step-child turned best friend.

And perhaps, she thinks, that will be good enough. She was lucky to experience such a strong connection with a man, to feel someone love you so strongly that they would literally give their life for you. Regina will always love Robin, knows she'll never have a love like that again, but it's nice to know she has people in her corner for once. It may take some time to fully learn to accept the love being offered to her by her family, her heart still needing to heal, but maybe allowing Snow and Henry's love into her life once more can truly mend her broken heart.

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_This was inspired partly by Lana's words this past weekend in Atlanta when she talked about how Regina has to learn that she had other types of love in her life, not just intimate/romantic love… and partly because the image of her cleaning out the closet popped into my head and I felt like torturing all of our hearts lol. I've apparently been friends with Hollie for too long and her love of pain and angst has rubbed off on me haha… Hope you enjoyed! Please leave a review! _


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